Thawing
by vampirekisses1901
Summary: Jesse moved on a year ago and Paul is helping Suze get over him. But Suze finds herself falling for Paul...ON HOLD
1. Chapter 1

Lets Bounce

**Thawing**

Pulling into the drive way with Brad and David, something large and green caught my eye.

"Oh my God! What the hell is that doing there?" Brad looked at me dumbly, while David had leapt outta the car, and was charging towards a massive green trampoline.

I also opened the door, slid out and looked at it, with David already bouncing on it. "This is so cool!" He yelled at me, happily. I smiled at him. Sometimes he's just too cute.

Brad had gotten out and stood by me. "What's it doing there?" he asked.

"How should I know?" I replied, pulled my bag over my shoulder, and headed towards the front door. My Mom had come out, and was looking at David who was still jumping crazily around on the trampoline. Seeing me, she came and tried (but didn't succeed) to ruffle my hair.

"Mom, what's that doing in our drive?" I asked, joining her on the step.

"Oh, it's just a little something to keep the boys and you happy." She looked at me, smiling. "Isn't it great? We can all go on it together, just like a family." Oh, that was why they had gotten it. I should've known. Mom was always on at me to get closer to Jake and (ew) Brad. She already knew I liked Doc the best.

But she had forgotten one simple thing. "Uh, Mom? I think that's cool and everything, don't get me wrong, but I will never go on it. It will mess up my hair."

She looked at me sternly. "You and your hair Susannah. You can fix it up afterwards. Besides, it's an easy way to loose weight."

If she thought that would help me, it so didn't. I'm quite slim, due to all the kick-boxing videos I do, but my Mom still apparently thinks I'm fat.

Great.

"Oh honey. I don't mean to say that you need to loose weight! I just meant it would be good so you can keep yourself looking lovely."

Nice save Mom.

"Yeh, whatever. I'm gonna go change 'coz Paul's gonna pick me up in an hour. You know that I'm missing dinner don't you?"

"Sure thing Suzie. You go and make yourself look good for him." I fake smiled at her, and then trudged up the stairs to my room.

Mom was so happy at the thought of me going out with Paul she didn't even make a fuss about missing dinner. But, it's usually Andy who does, and Mom calms him down.

She doesn't even realise that I'm not going OUT out with Paul. As in, he isn't my boyfriend. I'm just sorta dating him coz of our deal to do with Jesse.

Although, that's not really relevant anymore I suppose. We just got into a habit. See, Jesse moved on after our second kiss in the graveyard. I was basically broken after that, but what surprised me that it was Paul who brought me back to earth. Of course, at first I thought he was just trying to get into my pants, but I soon realised he was sincere about helping me, which showed he cared about me a lot I suppose.

He held me when I cried, and let me soak his entire wardrobe with my tears. He and Father D alone understood what I was going though, but all Father D did was pat me on the arm and gave me a box of tissues. I mean, David knew something was up too, but when he asked me all I said was "ghost problems", and he left it at that.

With Paul though, he was my rock. Seriously. I don't know what I would have done without him.

It's been a year since Jesse moved on, but Paul has always been there with me.

So we continued to see each other, and a few times lately, I've been feeling something every time he's around. Its like my heart has been waking up and I can feel butterflies inside me whenever I see him.

A couple of times when he's kissed me I've felt myself wanting more of that. Paul's kisses weren't like the first one we shared on his bed. He's so gentle, and doesn't pressure me or anything.

Mom interrupted my thoughts by calling up the stairs to ask what time I would be back.

"I'm not sure. I'll ask Paul when he gets here ok?" I yelled back down the stairs. Then I turned back into my room and began the hardest of tasks.

Deciding what to wear. Even though I'm pretty sure Paul and I aren't going out, I still want to look good for him. I mean, Paul's a guy, and an extremely hot one at that.

At long last I decided on my tight dark blue jeans, and an emerald green top that Mom bought me a couple of days ago. I thought I'd break it in tonight. She said it matched the colour of my eyes and made them stand out like lasers.

When I looked in the mirror I could see what she meant. The thing I wasn't sure about was that you could see my cleavage without me even bending over. And as it was quite tight, it made my boobs stick out quite a bit.

I may change it in a minute, but for now, hair and make-up time. I didn't have to do much with my hair, I just brushed it out and let it curl gently against my shoulders, glad that I had washed it this morning. All my make-up consisted of was mascara, lip-gloss and a little blusher. I don't even have to put on cover up anymore, due to the way California has changed my completion for the best.

Still, even though I hadn't needed to do much, there still wasn't time to change my top, as I heard Paul arriving in his BMW and Mom greeting him warmly.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey, sorry its such a short chappie, but I'm doing 'homework' right now, so I can't risk it that much

**Hey, sorry its such a short chappie, but I'm doing 'homework' right now, so I can't risk it that much! But I promise the next chapter is longer.**

**Thank you to Alex, my bestest craziest friend who read it and reviewed first! Love ya hun! **

**Disclaimer: I am not Meg Cabot...annoyingly. **

**Anyway, here goes:**

"Hey Mrs. Ackerman." I heard Paul say to my Mom. "I'm here for Suze."

"Yeh, she's just coming." I came downstairs just as Mom turned around. "Oh, there you are Suzie."

"Yeh, here I am." I said, looking at Paul who grinned at me. Wow…..he looked _good._ He had on a black shirt which was open at the collar and dark jeans that were faded in all the right-or wrong, depending on how you looked at it-places.

My heart started beating faster. Damn you, you stupid heart. Oh, wait, my heart is kinda important isn't it? Anyway, I was sure Paul could hear it speed up. If he did, he didn't show it.

"Hey _Suzie_, you ready to go?" Paul smirked at me and I glared at him, daring him to call me 'Suzie' again. I was also trying to ignore the massive drum beat that was banging inside me…….

…that sounds _wrong._ But whatever, You guys know what I mean. "Yes _Paulie_, I'm ready." I smirked back at him.

Unfortunately, Mom took it the wrong way, _(A/N-No…not THAT way…)_ thinking we had pet names for each other. She beamed at both of us, and winked at me. I was obviously expected to wink back, so I did, trying not to draw attention to my wink.

However, Paul _did_ notice, causing him to wink at me gulp, which made my Mom wink at _him._

I had just witnessed my mother winking at my boyfriend. Ew.

If anyone had come in at that moment, they would have thought we all had severe eye-twitching problems.

Nice.

Anywho, eventually we all finished winking at each other (again _ew_), so Paul and I could get going on our 'date'.

"So Suze, how you been lately?" Paul took my hand as we crossed the driveway towards his BMW. "Sorry I couldn't talk to you much at school today, but I had a damned tennis match with the RLS students." He glared at the ground, and I laughed.

"What's wrong Paul, did they beat you?" I said, teasingly. He turned his gaze on me, and pouted.

"No, they did not 'beat' me. We…..drew."

I raised my eyebrows and pulled back a piece of my hair that had gotten stuck to my lip gloss. "You…'drew'? Why? I would've thought you'd have thrashed them." I grinned at him and he suck out his tongue.

Hmm…..what a nice looking tongue Paul has. It looked so strong yet so gentle, and-WAIT! I'm not meant to be thinking about Paul's tongue!! Bad Suze, very bad Suze.

"I did, except one player. He was an asshole." We had reached the car and Paul unlocked it with one of those remote thingies. Hey, did I ever say I know the different parts of a car?

I shook my head at him as I climbed in. "Everyone is an asshole who beats you Paul." He just grinned crookedly and slammed the door in my face.

Very romantic.

Hang on…..it isn't a date is it? Oh, whatever. I'm beginning to think I want it to be a date after all……

**Sorry again for the length of it! Please review!  
**


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry it took quite a while to update

**Sorry it took quite a while to update. My DSL connection was down so I couldn't access fanfiction.**

**Disclaimer: I am not Meg Cabot…….a real shame.**

**Here's the longer chapter anyway. **

While we were in Paul's car driving downtown, we just chatted about random stuff. And I do mean random. We started off from tennis players and somehow ended up on the subject of stones. Don't ask me why.

It's just, it's so easy to talk to Paul. It always used to seem guarded, but now, when we talk, we talk about anything at all. It's like that with Adam, but I have no wish to kiss him…

…even though I don't want to kiss Paul.

You know what? Is lying actually that bad? I mean, you won't go to hell will you? Oh well. It's not like I'm lying to anybody.

Just maybe myself.

Whatever. I'm gonna shut up now.

"So Suze," Paul interrupted my debate about lying. "What was that trampoline doing in your driveway?"

We had pulled up alongside the sidewalk, and I got out, scowling at it. "Mum says she wants me and my stepbrothers to spend more time with each other, but she also let out something else about why its there too."

Paul had gotten out too, slammed his car door, and stepped up onto the sidewalk next to me. "So…….?" He asked, raising his eyebrow.

"So……?" I mimicked him, raising both my eyebrows.

"What's the other reason?"

Oh, that. Duh.

Tracing the crack on the ground with one foot, I put my hand on my hip and sighed. I really didn't want to tell Paul the 'other reason'. Why had I even _said_ that there was another reason? God, I am stupid sometimes. I mean, would _you_ wanna tell this guy that you may or may not like (even though I'm pretty sure I do like Paul), that your Mom wants you to loose weight?

Um, that would be a big fat no.

And knowing my luck, Paul will probably look at me and say, 'well Suze, I don't mean to be rude but your Mom may have a point.'

No WAY am I going to tell Paul. Although I thought that before he touched my arm.

Let me just say, in my defence, Paul has pretty nice looking arms, very strong and darkly tanned. And I'm telling you, when you see and _feel _one of them touching you, you feel as though you'd do anything for them to touch more of you.

Hey, I'm a girl. What d'ya want me to say?

"Suze……"Paul wheedled. "What is it? Tell me please?" I stood my ground, trying to ignore his hand on my arm, and the heat it gave off. I've been trying to ignore a lot of things lately.

He changed his tone of voice. And I hate to say it, but it weakened me at the knees hearing it.

Not good.

"Suze. Come on. You know you want to." Paul whispered slowly and sexily into my ear.

Jeez. Does he know what he's _doing_ to me? Apparently he did, since when I shivered-believe me, I was not cold-he started running his fingers down my bare arm. "What's wrong Suzie?"

"Um…."I said faintly. "Nothings, uh……wrong." Shit, could I BE more obvious?

That would be ANOTHER big fat no. Great.

"Yeah right." Paul shook his head at me, and gave me an amused smirk. "That's why you're looking as if nothings wrong. Well, I mean, you probably feel as if everything is right now, and believe me, I do to. But I can still tell that you're hiding something. Suze, just tell me will ya?"

Did I mention that despite Paul being my 'rock', he can still be the biggest jerk known to man?

Well, I've just figured it out. Yeah, just this minute. Took me a while didn't it? And during that time, I even _fell_ for the guy. Shows how stupid I am I guess.

Being angry at Paul, not to mention myself for actually believing that Paul had changed caused me to rip my arm away from his, and say "Paul, I wanna go home now."

Paul had looked a bit surprised when I had yanked my arm away, but now his expression was weird and unreadable. "Suze, I booked a table for dinner."

Did he really think that would stop me from going? God, I can't believe what I saw in him. "So?" I said sarcastically. "I'm not hungry."

Liar, liar pants on fire.

I was starving. I had had no lunch, as I had to see Father Dom, and I didn't have time to grab something when I had gotten home. But I didn't want to eat with Paul at some stupid restaurant (even though I had felt differently about it 15 minutes ago), and secondly, Mom had made me feel kinda self conscious, so I was planning on starving myself for a week.

Not the best way to deal with it I know, but hey, I'm a girl in a crisis.

Sort of.

"Suze" Paul was saying, his expression had changed from neutral to kind of nervous and irritable at the same time. "I booked a table at Horizon."

Jesus H Christ! Say that again……..?

"WHAT? _Horizon?_" I said, shocked. Horizon is one of the most expensive chain restaurants in the world. Ok, in America but whatever. Same difference.

But it still costs a whole lot of bucks for even a SALAD. Like, 50 for a plain one, just with normal dressing. And Paul was gonna take ME there? If I had known that, I would have dressed up a bit more. Heck, I'd have bought a whole new wardrobe to choose from.

However, instead, I can't even take up the offer of Paul's. Great. I've always wanted to go to Horizon to see what it's like, but now I guess I'll never get the chance.

"Well yeah" Paul said. "Where did you think we were going?" Where did I think we were going? _Where did I think we were going?_

"Um, possibly somewhere less expensive Paul. Why would you wanna spend all that on me? " He just looked at me for like, 5 minutes. I'm serious. It was starting to get uncomfortable (so much for feeling at ease around him now).

Finally he spoke. "Why somewhere less expensive? I heard you and CeeCee talking about how you'd love to go to Horizon." He had HEARD us talking about it? So what, he used snapped his fingers and was like 'your wish is my command'? Um…ok.

"Because Paul, I don't want you to spend that much. That takes a sizeable portion out of your account doesn't it?" How could he not see that? And why could he even want to spend that much on me? I mean, yeah, I know he gets quite a lot of money from his Grandfather, and he doesn't have to get a job. I mean, come on. I have to work in a clothes shop to cover my costs for the week. And that's including my employers discount.

Paul did something very surprising them. He looked his gaze into mine and went, in this really quiet voice, "Suze, you're totally worth it."

Wait-WHAT DID PAUL SAY??

**So there you have it, the 3****rd**** chapter. Review plz! I wanna know what you think before I update!**


	4. Chapter 4

Very sorry again…

**Very sorry again…..my computer is playing up and my DSL randomly decides to disconnect for weeks, so yah. That's the reason why I haven't been reviewing.**

**Disclaimer: I am not Meg Cabot blah blah blah….**

Paul frowned slightly as he looked at me. I couldn't reach his eyes anymore, and just stared at the sidewalk, thinking _Paul did not just say that _over and over again. There is no way he could have said something as nice as that…..could he? I braved a look at him, and saw he had walked a little way aways, and had squatted down on the edge of the sidewalk that stretched out onto the beach, his arms crossed.

Ok, if that's not defensive, I don't know what is.

He actually looked really good sitting there. As the sun was setting in behind him, I could just see his dark profile, and the strong set of his jaw.

And suddenly I saw through his defence, to the guy who had helped me when I was broken. He really wasn't that bad. He had feelings, and got hurt, although Paul was too strong to show them most of the time. But I saw that he did get weakened too.

And I knew, just knew, that I was ready to move on. Sure, the thing that I had had with Jesse I was never gonna forget, but it wasn't really real, as Paul used to say. But I knew I wanted to make me and Paul real, and at last I was ready to do just that.

"Paul," I sat down next to him, touched his arm, and when he didn't pull away, I caught hold of his hand and began stroking it. He just looked at me, unsure of how I was acting.

"Listen, I'm sorry Paul. I didn't mean to take it out on you. Its just you were there and I had to let it out." I gazed up at his expression, which was confused.

"But Suze, what's the matter?" He looked down at me so kindly that for a minute I felt like crying. And I don't even know why.

Seriously. I am one sentimental girl at the mo. Probably PMT.

Paul reached out and grazed my cheek with the back of his hand, running it down the side of my face, until he reached my chin and balanced it in his fingers. "Suze, come on. What's the matter? You can tell me."

I sighed.

And then I actually _did_ start to cry. Great. I hate crying. I really, really do. And I've been crying a lot lately, so I know what I'm talking about. Well, now I think about it I haven't cried too much for a month or two, just in little snatches.

It wasn't broken sobs though, this time it was silent, and I closed my eyes, letting the salty water run down my face, doing nothing to prevent it.

Paul did though. You'd think by now that he was tired of mopping me up after a crying fit, but apparently he wasn't. He wrapped his arms around me tightly, pulling me close and wiped my tears away with his thumb.

"Oh Suze." Paul whispered, rocking me gently. "I'm so sorry. I didn't realise….." He broke off, as I looked at him in confusion through the streams that were flowing from my eyes. I had no idea what he was talking about. I mean, yeah, he was saying sorry-always good-but I didn't know what _for. _

"Huh?" I said intelligently. Realising how I sounded, I tried to make a proper sentence. "What do you mean Paul?"

This was his cue to look at _me_ in confusion. Even though I was having a minor breakdown-ok whatever, a crying fit-I could still appreciate how good he looked even when he was confused. His eyebrows were knitted together as his eyes were on me, piecing though my soul.

"Suze, you're upset because of….._him_ right?"

Him. We never spoke his name out loud. It used to hurt to much, and it probably still would hurt, but it would only be a pinprick to what the pain used to have been. I mean, I was pretty sure that I had moved on from _him_, to Paul now.

Anyway-what did Paul say? He thought it was something to do with Jesse, when it actual fact it was to do with my mother and himself. Guys sometimes are just too simple.

I smiled then, at the thought of Paul being simple. He was nowhere _near _simple actually. Now super-confused by my smile, Paul gave me an exasperated expression.

"It's not to do with him then?" He said, waiting expectantly, and I thought I caught a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"No Paul, it's not to do with him. It's my Mom." I frowned when I said that, and automatically held my stomach in. It just looked the same.

God, _why _did she have to make me self-conscious now?

Paul let out a sigh of relief, but when I raised my eyebrows he quickly said "Well, what's wrong with your Mom? Did she say something?"

I captured a load of sand in my hand and let it drain out slowly, through the gaps between my fingers. "Yeah, she did say something."

Paul held his hand underneath mine and caught the sand that fell from it. "What did she say?" He gazed at me, waiting for me to carry on.

I might as well get it over with. Maybe I could even go home and go to bed soon, and manage to sleep my hunger pains off. "It's just, you know that trampoline?" Paul nodded. "Well, Mom said that I should use it quite a bit." He frowned at me.

"So? How's that something bad?" He didn't get it. I should have just left it there, but no, the stupid idiot that I am carried on.

"Mom also said that I could-that I………"I trailed off, and I felt tears prick at my eyes again.

Paul squeezed me tightly to him, and brushed my hair outta my eyes. "She said that you could……?"

"Well…….thatitwouldbeagreatwaytolooseweightandicoulddowiththatbutithurtmyfeelingsbecauseshewaspracticallysayingthatiwasfatsoitsmademeselfconscious."

Whoa Suze, a bit faster would be good.

Paul raised his eyebrows (yet again). "Uh, can you talk a bit slower please Suze? So I can actually understand you this time?"

"I was hopping that you wouldn't understand me."

"Suze, Suze, Suze. Just tell me what's wrong." He stroked my back, and I shivered. "You cold?" Well, I was, but that wasn't why I had shivered. Before I could say anything though, Paul had shrugged off his jacket and put it around me, helping to get my arms in it. It was kinda large on me, but it felt good to have in on, like I was his or something.

I know I know. But it just _did_ ok?

"Now, are you gonna tell me?" I nodded.

"Mom said that it would be a great way to…..to loose weight, but it hurt my feelings as she was practically saying that-that I was….I was fat, so it made me self-conscious….." I groaned into Paul's jacket, and felt myself going red.

I can't believe that I just said that in front of Paul.


End file.
